Are you a guy looking for a new shirt somewhere on the Upper West Side? Forget it. The retailers don't want your business.

Take the Gap on Broadway and 67th Street. It has shrunk the men's section down to a space that is smaller than my bathroom. You can basically have your pick of a few pairs of jeans and a couple of shirts. I'm exaggerating, but the men's department used to take up about half the store. On the basis of what I know about global gender demographics, that seems sensible. But now that Gap is all about the women. Guys: go elsewhere.

Club Monaco on Broadway and 87th: we're out of luck entirely. The store eliminated all of its men's clothing.

Kenneth Cole on Columbus and 77th: no clothing at all anymore. Have your pick of belts, shoes and bags.

The Upper West Side is definitely a central location, but I suppose that is now the case only for lox.